In the news nearby: an Osceola County (Disney World nearby) two-year-old gets shot with a small-caliber handgun he says he found in the back of a pickup truck. According to the Orlando (Slantinel) Sentinel January 6 local news section article, the boy – and the cops – are unsure who shot him. And the dumbass newspaper reports blindly the supposition that the gun shot the boy (all by itself!). The cops, according to the paper, are investigating the gun, the boy or anyone else who possibly might have shot the child. And the story is straight-faced.
And what I want to know is: who put the two-year-old into the back bed of the pickup? Who put the handgun there to be found by the boy (unless, of course, the gun found the boy instead!), and why was the reporter’s editor not flogged by management for not asking any of those questions?
Should the headline really have read “Mystery Self-Firing Gun Attacks Tyke!”? Will the silliness never end? Is this a sideways attempt to prove to the seven people who still read a local newspaper that them thar guns be dangerous, so you better go get yourself registered as a Federal Firearms Dealer before you go selling them thangs to little boys!?
And anytime now, I expect to hear your president and mine try some new tears out on the beguiled and gulled media over this recent outrage against innocent humans by those dastardly man-hating guns! Go. Save. Me. (or not).